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Friday, October 15, 2004


on the cardinals

does any baseball fan want to see the yankees play the cardinals? i suppose there's a few romanticists who will recall 1926 or 1964 or something -- but i don't see how a true romantic can wish to see a clash of the baseball leviathans.

everyone knows the yankees are the microsoft of baseball, but what is less well known is that the cardinals are rather like the ibm -- faded glory, perhaps, but still titanic by any measure. nine world championships runs second only to the yankees gaudy 26, and is nearly twice as many as any other franchise (five being good for bronze, split among several teams). moreover, they've won the NL pennant 15 times, second best in a squeaker over the new york/san francisco giants (16).

the reawakening of the cardinal franchise is something every cub fan (including yours truly) dreads -- and yet we are amid it. the renaissance of the cardinals is something to behold, having now won their division four of five years. their five year win total -- 475 -- falls behind only the yankees (487), oakland (483) and atlanta (481). yet worse, many of their core players -- pujols, rolen, renteria -- are young, and eight of their top nine in innings pitched in 2004 are 31 or younger.

and worst of all, it gives the appearance of adding to the "legend" of the man (god?) known simply as The Genius. if i have to listen to one more cardinal fan wax poetic about The Genius carrying four catchers or hitting the pitcher eighth -- thereby giving the *weakest* hitter in the lineup a greater probability of more at-bats, you retards, not the three-hole batter -- i'm going to vomit. one wonders how such naked pseudointellectual fraud carries the day with so many people. four manager of the year awards (maybe now five) are proof, however, that there's one born every minute and that great talent can overcome quixotic leadership.

could it be that saint louis now resembles not venerable ibm -- but modern proletarian powerhouse wal-mart? it's a fitting analogy -- take a look at their fan base:

wal-mart nation

these people ain't shopping at saks fifth avenue.

anyway, go houston, even if i lose no love for you and you play in Corrupt Failed Corporation Field. save us all from microsoft versus wal-mart in a battle of the corporate stars.

(and boston -- get off the mat, willya?)

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